You See Friends....

I stood in shock, with the invitation in my hands, it had arrived. I stood inside my little living room and opened the envelope and there I saw the words : We would be happy to see at and ’s wedding at.....The words got blur for my eyes and the invitation slowly dropped out of my hands and landed on the floor. With tears coming to my eyes I stirred out in empty space thinking “How can I go to that wedding?”. I kept standing there for a while and before I knew it I heard the doorbell and someone coming inside my flat.
- Hey I..... said stopping up by the look on my face I guess
- Hey I replied and took myself together and smiled at her
- Are you okay? She asked and saw the invitation on the floor and picked it up- Am fine. I said trying to sound calm
- Oh
- Oh what?
- Is it this what it is about?
- What?
- Come on , ’s wedding
- Oh that
- You got to get over him, he is getting married and your one of his best mates
- I know that
- So you are going?
- Don’t think so
- But you have to
- Why?
- Because you’re his friend
- But tell me something HOW CAN I STAND LISTING TO HIM SAYING I DO TO SOMEONE ELSE? I yelled starting getting into panic
- BECAUSE IT’S HIS WEDDING DAY, THE HAPPIEST DAY OF HIS LIFE AND YOU’RE NOT GOING TO RUIN IT
- THAT IS WHY AM NOT GOING
- BUT YOU ARE
- AND I GUESS YOU ARE?
- OF ‘CORSE I AM, damn it , I don’t wanna fight with you said
- You don’t understand , you have and I’m happy for you but it has been hard enough for me to just see them together and now this, I just don’t know how to go through it
- But you have to
- Right I have got that, and now am going to work, so if you don’t mind?
-
- I don’t wanna talk about it! I said and with that note she went off and I went to work.

I worked at a grocer’s store and was just putting some merchandise on the shelves when I notice someone coming over to me. I felt it right away, it was ! I knew it was him, but I wished I was wrong I couldn’t face him yet.
- Heeyy Sunshine said with a big smile, and how could I not smile back
- Hey you I replied
- I wanna talk to you
- You do? I said not knowing if I should start to get my hopes up or....
- Yes do you get off soon?
- Well yes but I guess you knew that. I said and put the last thing on the shelves. I took the boxes and with ’s help I got them out back. Then I looked at him and saw the exciting look on his face...
- Do I even dare to know what you will talk to me about?
- Of ‘cause it’s my wedding
- Really, ain’t you going to marry anyway. I said and thought ups since I probably sounded too happy about that idea
- No silly....it’s not that!
- Oh I just replied
- Did you get the invitation
- Hmm...the invitation?
- ?
- What?
- You did get it
- Well yes I did
- And?
- And what? I said going over to find my things. I was of for the day, but the questions kept coming out of ’s mouth and I really just wanted to make him shout up.
-You are coming right? He asked and I stood with the back towards him not knowing what to say
- ...are you here? asked and turned me around
- Yeah of ‘cause am here
- What’s wrong? He asked and saw the panic in my eyes
- Nothing , nothing is wrong. I said and grabbed my jacket
- I don’t believe you
- Well didn’t thought you would I said and walked towards the door but then he grabbed my arm
- spell it out. He said and I just looked into those blue eyes of his and without thinking I leaned in and kissed him right on the mouth. At first he actually kissed me back but then he pulled me gently away.
- ...
- No don’t say anything, it was my fault am sorry
- It’s....I’m...
- .....I did get the invitation but I don’t wanna ruin your big day, so am not coming - But you have to come your one of my best friends, I need you there
- AND I AM IN LOVE WITH YOU! I yelled, so stood and looked shocked at me- I...I don’t know what to say
- Hmm no but AAARRGGHH doesn’t matter am going home, so should you, am sure your busy planning your wedding
- But... He said and I looked at him and shaked my head and left him.

I didn’t see him the next few days, but I heard plenty to the lads and who kept begging me to go to the wedding. Suddenly one day stood in my door and wanted to talk looking all nervous.
- ...We got to talk almost whispered and I just showed him into the living room.
- about the other day.... He almost whispered
- No just forget about what I said
- How can I, you said that you.....that you were in love with me
- ...I know what I said.....but since you don’t feel the same I don’t see any point in discussion it because what can that in impossible change? I said and turned around so I couldn’t look him in the eyes it hurt too much.
- Because I love you....just not in that way but I...(He grabbed my shoulder and turned me around to face him)....I don’t wanna lose what we have
- ....what we have... I whispered
- We are best friends and you mean the world to me
- ....Hmm friends.... I still whispered
- please
- What? I asked and looked him in the eyes
- I need you at my weeding, I need you as my friend it wouldn’t be perfect without you He begged
- don’t you see what you’re asking me to do? You’re asking me to go and see you get married to someone else knowing that I.....that I wanted to be the one I cried out and got quiet for a second.
- ...I know...and trust me I don’t want to hurt you, it’s the last thing I wanna do, but please come, I beg you He said with eyes that begged me more than words. With tears in my eyes and on the way to break down I gave in...
- .....okay I’ll come... I whispered but he heard it and a smile appeared on his lips.
- THANK YOU He almost yelled and gave me a huge hug...
- ....now ain’t you busy? I have some stuff to do... I said trying to get him out of there before the tears would run down my cheeks.
- Yeah.....I just.....Thank you I will hold you on to that He said smiling before he ran out of the door.
I went over to the window and saw him drive of and in that moment I felt the tears running down my cheeks.

The day had come and I was walking around in my flat. It was ’s wedding day and I was a mess. My heart was breaking but there was nothing to do about it. I knew what I had to do, and I had promised I would come. Every day the last few weeks he had called me to make sure I kept my promise. But as the says goes....What are friends for?!?!I was in my dress and ready or well my looks was ready but inside I would never be. I heard ’s car coming up in the drive in, they really wanted to make sure I was there. I went out to the car with and saw looking worried at me before he gave me a huge hug.
- Don’t say a word please I got mumbled out and they just nodded and we drove off.

We got to the church and oh what a lot of people. Outside the church we met the others and came over to give me hug.
- Hey you said and came over to give me a hug
- Hey so everyone is here?
- Yeah almost I think and how are you? He asked looking straight into my eyes
- Well I think you know how I am I said trying to sound calm
- You’ll be fine, and I’ll be right by your side the whole day he said and I smiled to him knowing he meant it well. We went into the church and had his arm around me and guided me up towards the first benches. Then I saw him standing there looking better than ever and so sweet and nervous. looked at me with a huge smile and came over to me. He put his arms around me right away.
- Am so glad you came, it means the world to me He whispered into my ear
- That’s what friends are for... I mumbled back
- get back up here it’s getting time almost yelled
- Yeah... said and looked nervous at me and then walked up to .
I sat down beside who tried his best to make me smile and not feel too bad about it all. Then suddenly we heard the wedding melody and I took a deep breath and stood up like the others. Everybody turned their heads to see the bride except me; I was looking at who with a huge smile looked at . She came up by his side and I had to admit that she was pretty but it was heart breaking for me to look at them. Now the worst came, the “I do” part. I found myself standing wishing would say no, but I also knew he wouldn’t do that. Then the words came...
- I do said and I looked straight down into the floor while I felt the tears running down my cheeks. I put my arms around myself trying not to break down while my heart got ripped into a thousand pieces. notice my state of mind and put a comforting arm around my waist.
- It’s over soon whispered to me but I couldn’t get any words out of my mouth to answer him. My body was shaking and all I wanted was to run out of the church and get away from there.
- Sweetie relax their going out in a second whispered and I try once more to pull myself together and take away the tears from my eyes.
I looked up and saw and turning around. looked over at me and I try my best to smile. He looked so happy when he walked out with .
- Come whispered to me and I followed him out of the church.
kept his promise and stayed by my side the whole day. A day filled with happy people except me. I did everything I possible could to hide my true feelings and I did it pretty well since nobody seem to notice anything well except my best friends. Now that I was standing inside the huge hall where the party for the wedding was taking place I was pulling in the last impossible strength of acting happy I had left. My eyes looked out on the dance floor where I watched dancing around. Then he suddenly noticed me and walked over towards me with a huge smile around his lips. He came over and handed out his hand towards me...
- It’s time for you and I to have a dance said
- No it’s.....
- Hey sunshine it wasn’t a question he said and grabbed my hand and took me out on the dance floor. Then he looked me in the eyes with his deep eyes and the sweet smile of his for a while and then he pulled me in close so I felt his strong arms around me. My heart was beating like crazy feeling him so close and yet so far away. I felt his cheek against mine and then over his shoulders my eyes met ’s. There was no doubt about what I saw in her eyes, they were shinning of gloating “His mine, you didn’t get him”! I looked away with tears coming to my eyes, it was getting to much, I couldn’t do this anymore. The sang ended in the back ground and pulled my gently back in front of him and looked into my tearfully eyes.
- ....sunshine? He said noticing the tears
- ....I.... I mumbled and walked away from him. I walked faster the closer I got to the door. I got out from the hall and walked into a little room while I noticed had followed me.
- He whispered and came over and put his arms around me. Right when he did that I broke completely down. The tears kept running down my cheeks and my heart was completely ripped apart.
- I.....I...I....I can’t do this anymore I cried out
- I know but you gotta make it just a little while more replied comforting
- But I can’t
- You can’t leave without saying bye to him...( looked me in the eyes and with his fingers he try to take away my tears)....Be strong just for a little while longer said and I took a deep breath and heard someone enter the room.
- Sunshine said and walked towards me while slowly disappeared out of the room.
- Sorry about that before I got mumbled out
- It’s okay, I know It was selfish of me begging you to come but I just really wanted you to be here He said coming closer
- No I probably would have wanted the same I replied quietly
- But still I didn’t mean to hurt you in anyway I love you He said and by the last words he made me looked up into his eyes...
- As a friend
- Yes but as a very dear friend I never want to lose He said gently breaking my heart yet again and making my eyes filled up again
- I.... I can’t stay any longer I said and took my hands
- I understand He replied and looked at me gently. He pulled me in for a hug, and kissed me on the cheek
- Thank you He whispered while I felt my body shaking and he hold my face up with his hands....
- No matter what, you’ll always be my sunshine and if you need me am here remember that He said and I just nodded. We stood there just looking at each other for a while until I couldn’t take it anymore knowing he would never be mine.....
- ....I love you... I whispered and kissed him on the mouth before I ran out of the room, of the huge house, out to a car and drove back to my flat as fast as I could. I parked the car and ran into my flat. Throwing my keys on a table, placing my arms around myself falling to the floor with tears running down my cheeks like a stream. I stayed there crying my eyes out for a while before I got up and went into my bed room and found a big bag. I threw the bag on my bed and ran around in the house putting clothes and other necessary things in my bag. I grabbed my jacket and put on my shoes. I grabbed a pen and paper and wrote a note which I placed in an envelope on the door to my flat. Then took my car keys and my bag which I thrown into the back of the car. I sat down in the front seat and for a few seconds I just starred out on the road with the tears still falling down my cheeks. I turn the key around and drove of......

drove into the drive in to ’s flat. He had had a conversation with about . had been a bit worried about her, and had promised to go and cheek up on her. walked up to the door and quickly found out he was too late. He looked at the note he had taken down from the door. The door was locked, it was all lucked of. He felt worried but also knew he couldn’t do a thing. He placed the note in his pocket and drove back to the wedding party. He walked out on the stairs to the park behind the house and with blank eyes he starred out into empty space. Suddenly He heard and by his side...
- So did you find her? asked but didn’t reply
- ? asked and took the note from his pocket and handed it to them

Hey I was pretty sure it was you who would come first, so I write this letter to you, but also to the others, please thank them and tell them that I love them (and you).Thanks for everything today , I don’t think I would have made it without you. You all have a huge place in my heart, and the last thing I want to do is to hurt you in any way, but I had to do this. I had to leave. When you get this letter I will be gone and......please don’t tell a thing before he gets back from his honeymoon and tell him that I will always be there....in his heart.... Love you all....take care and don’t worry about me.... Yours

- This is a joke right? said with tears in her eyes
- Am afraid not mumbled
- But her flat....? started
- Was all lucked up mumbled
- But she will be back right? asked
- Of ‘cause she will said trying to comforting all of them
- ....I don’t know.... almost whispered and starred up in the sky with a tear falling down his cheek.